census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Randomize
