Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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