Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
