what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Randomize
