I think i sorta joined a cult last night
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Randomize
