Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
My penis needs a shock collar
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Randomize
