found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I smell like Dick and happiness
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
