Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize