So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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