That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
