You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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