if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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