Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
