I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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