Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
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