I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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