Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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