In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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