My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
