Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
