I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
