We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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