You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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