we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
