You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
So here I am, sexting at work.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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