Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
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