I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
