Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I have feelings that need drinking.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
