My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
