and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
