You smell like stripper and shame
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
