You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
