She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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