I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize
