Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
