I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
