Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
