i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
