I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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