what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
