He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
