I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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