You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
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