Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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