I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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