nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
