If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
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