Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
