To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
