since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
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