you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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