I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
